Stephen J. Buhler, Attorney at Law

Remaining positive during the process of divorce

When Utah residents get married, they often have several goals in mind to share with their spouse. These goals can be both short term and long term, and the marriage itself is seen as a celebration among family and friends of the new union.

Many individuals do not look at a divorce in the same positive light, as it can be a stressful occasion when the end of a marriage is disputed between the couple. However, individuals should take solace in knowing that the divorce can be effective in many respects to accomplishing new goals.

For instance, individuals are often given an opportunity to reinvent themselves after a divorce. Whether it is going back to school, getting a new job or pursuing other opportunities, individuals may have new doors opened that were previously shut during the marriage.

A divorce can also have a positive effect on the couple's children. Couples often carry on for years in an unhappy marriage, which can have a negative effect on how they parent. Accordingly, the divorce may make the individual a much stronger parent and allow the individual a better opportunity to reconnect with one's children.

Individuals should realize they can set goals in the divorce, just as they did at the start of the marriage. Whether these goals are personal or professional in nature, they can have a positive impact on the person's life.

Of course, the goals often start with the divorce process itself. For example, an individual may need alimony from his or her ex-spouse in order to maintain a standard of living or to get a new job or education. The individual may also have goals that require a particular division of the couple's property and assets. By making a plan and vigorously enforcing one's rights in the divorce, an individual can put himself or herself in the best possible position to come out of the divorce in a positive manner.

Source: Huffington Post, "13 reasons a divorce is anything but a failure," Brittany Wong, Aug. 3, 2015

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